An Unfortunate Deer In A Small Town

This is not the actual deer.

A week or so ago, we went to our house in town and there was a little mule deer in the yard, laying down. It watched us warily, but didn't move. We circled around it completely, checking on our ripening pears, apples, etc. The deer didn't budge or even seem very nervous. Our house is a block from Main Street, so maybe it was used to people?

We should have guessed there was something wrong with it.

On Tuesday, I took H-Bomb to preschool. Sawed-Off and I ran some errands, and then I noticed something in the yard. I thought, oh! it must be that deer, maybe it's asleep. I walked closer, and it was dead, flies a-buzzin' dead. Gross. I knew that if #1 came to town and it was still there, he might feel compelled to take care of it himself. But, being that our house is in a town, I felt like there should be someone on the town payroll to take care of these kinds of things.

I didn't know who to call, so I called the Sheriff's Office. They told me to call The City, it's The City's responsibility.

I called The City. They told me to call the Police.

I called the Police. They told me to call Some Guy. But then they checked with Some Guy while I was on the phone, and he only takes care of roadkill on the highway. They then told me I should call the Dept. of Wildlife guy. Told me the Sheriff has DWR's phone number, which neither one of us could find in the phone book.

I called the Sheriff back. He gave me DWR's office and home numbers, and said if DWR won't do it, call him back and he'll "push some buttons. It's really The City's responsibility."

So, I called DWR at both office and home, left some messages. Went to pick up H-Bomb from school, an hour or so later still hadn't heard back from DWR.

I called the Sheriff again. Told him I hadn't heard from DWR, but I'd really like the dead deer out of my yard. He said he would "make it happen."

The boys and I went for pizza, ran another errand, and guess what? No dead deer in the yard. Finalmente.

I bet The City is real happy with me.