Ranch Chores

The alternate title for this post: We Do Things Differently Around Here.

As we continue on our winter's adventure on the ranch, I thought I would share a few things that make our daily life somewhat...different.

Nearly every morning, we wake up to no water in our house. Not a drop. We make a pot of coffee using water from a gallon jug we stash every night. Then Number One goes out to the well and turns on the heater to thaw the frozen water pipes and/or jostle the water pressure switch. Anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour after that, we can resume our usual watery activities like flushing the toilet and doing dishes.

Every day, sometimes more than once, I am tasked with feeding the lizard. The lizard has a fancy wooden cage/home that RanchHand and Number One made, complete with a big rock and sunlamp, a large branch for climbing, and his own water dish. This, however, is a wild lizard, and a very particular one. He only eats live food, and his food of choice is grasshoppers. There is a shortage of live grasshoppers in these snowy and frozen parts, and the occasional live cricket we find isn't enough to sustain the lizard. We have a remote-controlled feeding dish that would theoretically make the freeze-dried insects "jump" but it doesn't fit in the lizard's home. So I had to come up with a way to feed the poor creature.

Every day, I loop a strand of nylon thread around the head of a freeze-dried cricket. (the dried grasshoppers needed to be refrigerated--who knew?--and I had to throw them away). I dangle the cricket into the cage, and make it jump, crawl and hop around to attract the lizard's attention. Sometimes I just dangle it in the cage and he comes and grabs it. (Today he ate three in a row this way). Sometimes he's just not interested, and I suspend it so it hangs through the wire screen of the cage, and later I come back to find he's eaten it while I wasn't looking. Thank goodness. Sometimes I worry about that poor guy's eating habits.

Our oven no longer just "turns on." We can't just turn the knob, set the temperature, and start baking. There is something wrong with it (thank god it happened after our Thanksgiving feast!). Now, every time I want to bake something, I turn on the knob, and nothing happens. Number One has to come in with some sort of flame and light the oven burner thingie. I don't know exactly, but sometimes there is banging and cursing involved that seems to help with the process. And then the oven heats up and I can commence with my muffins or what-have-you.

We have been looking at these ovens...but are a bit frightened that prices aren't listed on the website! Perhaps someday I'll have you all help me choose a color...we'll start saving our pennies.

Taking care of Woody and Jessie used to be on our list of daily chores. Sadly, they are no longer on our list. It pains me to throw away banana peels (their favorite), crackers and miscellaneous vegetable scraps. It feels wasteful. As does the brand-new stake they received for Christmas.

It feels like there are more weird daily chores around here. When they come to mind, I'll add them. Until then, I've got to go find Number One so I can make some more muffins.