Shipping Day, Part One

Some of you might be aware how difficult it can be with two little boys running around. I have the perfect solution to behavioral challenges. First let me tell you, it's shipping day.

Shipping Day means that #1 et al have spent weeks gathering ALL the hundreds of cattle all over the ranch. We run cattle on almost 200,000 acres, so it's a huge job. Now, all the mama cows and their calves are down here, and we've been feeding them, waiting for shipping day.

On Shipping Day, we sort off all the calves (that means separate them from their mothers) and then the buyer comes and picks out the ones he wants. In this case, roughly three semi-truck loads that we will weigh and load up so he can haul them off.

Now, C.G. went and broke her foot yesterday, so we were in a bit of a panic. C.G., obviously, has a huge job on shipping day. And Wifey is not on the ranch. The lovely Miss Jenny is coming down to stay with my boys so I can help out in the corral today.

So, H-Bomb and Sawed Off have been mostly well-behaved this morning, excited about Miss Jenny's imminent arrival. To the point that H-Bomb went and got clothes for Sawed Off to wear today, and while I've been typing this, has been in the process of removing Sawed Off's jammies and has just succeeded in putting Sawed Off's sweatpants on. They have also done some cleaning up, and helped me make Pioneer Woman's Best Chocolate Sheet Cake. Ever. to feed all the hungry ranch hands after a hard day's work.

The answer to fixin' behavior troubles then?

Call in Miss Jenny. The boys just love her.

It's Starting To Look Like A House!

Due to this little problem, I haven't been able to post frequent pictures of the progress on our addition. Well, feast your eyes on these:


This picture shows the end of the house that will be our Master Suite. Notice the large window on the end. The existing window (in the log part) will become a patio door.


Above, from left, you can see two of our three bedroom windows. They will be high because although there is no view (gas tanks, neighbors, etc.) we wanted lots of air and light. The third window you see (same size) will be in our Master Bath, above the tub. The fourth, larger, window will be in our kitchen. More on that in a moment.

I am so excited to see these plans, that I drew from my own mind, coming to life! It's really going to work! It's going to be awesome! We can't wait.


Here, at left, you see our bathroom window again, and a better view of the kitchen window opening. We've just decided to put one single-hung window in the kitchen, so it will be nice and big and open.


And finally, from left, you see the opening for our French doors, leading out from the kitchen/dining room area to the back yard. Near the middle, our large picture windows in the dining room. These will be more impressive with the actual windows in there--it will be a nice configuration. On the end, more picture windows in the dining room/family room, configured to match the other windows. Oh, we are so excited!

They are almost finished putting on the boards for the roof, then sometime soon our actual roof will go on!

The Limitations of Satellite Internet...

Before I came down to the ranch, #1 and C.G. just bought movies to watch all the time. There was no television. For those of you who don't know, we live 35 miles away from the nearest town. We generate our own electricity (because we have to) and there is no telephone service. To get a decent cell phone signal, you have to drive 10 miles, one way, and pray for a cloudless sky.

When #1 and I started dating, I would record my favorite television shows and bring them down to watch at the ranch. I described the wonders of satellite television, and HBO. Before we knew it, C.G. had a dish on her roof. #1 and I would go up to her house at night to snuggle in and watch Sex & The City (gave C.G. an education to boot!), Friends, The Sopranos, whatever else happened to be on that we liked.

Before H-Bomb was born, we got our own dish so I didn't have to suffer through the million-degree temperatures upstairs at C.G.'s house.

A few years later, we started talking about Satellite Internet. You see, here on the ranch, being so far from everywhere, you really have to plan ahead. You have to be prepared. You never know what is going to break next and need immediate attention (read: parts). C.G. was forever driving off to the Big City (five hours away) to get something. It took a LOT of talking and convincing and we had to get several supporters (C.G.'s brother, a doctor friend, etc.) to make C.G. realize she couldn't live without this Internet business.

So now we have Satellite Internet. Have had it for almost two years now, and it is great. Has saved everyone a lot of driving, although I honestly can't say it has saved ANYONE any money--Internet shopping is too convenient--helps us keep in touch with The Outside World, that kind of thing.

Recently, we've been having troubles with download speed, even accessing web pages was interminably slow. Couldn't figure it out, but suspected it had something to do with RanchHand and Wifey--they have been downloading movies, entire movies, from Netflix--but we couldn't be sure they were the cause. And yesterday, RH said, "I've discovered YouTube!"

We had a satellite guy down here last week, to move the dish from the roof to the wall of the house, because we are getting a new roof any day now. While he was working, both C.G. and Wifey came up to him separately to ask questions. He walked in and asked me how many computers are on the system, and recommended that we upgrade to handle the traffic. Which I plan to do, as soon as I can drive up and make a stupid phone call, because you can't upgrade online. Ridiculous.

By default, I am the Network Administrator of this place, because I know the most about computers. And I was the loudest "let's get the Internet" advocate on the ranch. So, I now have a job.

And today, my job was to get down to the bottom of: Why The Hell It Takes For-Freakin-Ever To Get To A Damn Website, If You Get There At All.

I discovered that our provider has a policy that they call: Fair Access. In essence, this seems to exist to ensure that people don't monopolize the satellite system. I thought, well, that's a good idea. Now I just have to figure out who's monopolizing OUR system. But I kept reading. The Fair Access Policy ensures that individual satellite systems don't monopolize the entire system. In other words, there were restrictions placed on OUR system because of excessive downloading that had the power to impact OTHER USERS. That is some serious business. Who does that much downloading?? This is an explanation of the policy rational, in part:

"service usage data indicates that a small percentage of subscribers are responsible for a disproportionate amount of the total service traffic."

It does make sense. I asked #1 to talk to RH this morning. I said that I needed to take a look at his computer (Wifey is out of town) to make sure he didn't have programs running that he wasn't aware of, didn't have a virus, things like that. RH came over and said, "Yeah, Wifey does all that. No need to see the computer." And then he left.

Now, Wifey does NOT do all that. I have had to coach her through everything from attaching a document to an email, to actually getting online ever since she brought home their first computer. Yes, I said first computer. As a matter of fact, last I knew Wifey hadn't even forwarded the recipe exchange email I sent her because she didn't know how to cut and paste.

So, nothing against Wifey at all, she's part of the older generation that didn't have computers in school. That being said, Wifey don't know much. Especially if there is a problem. That could be affecting the system.

I told #1 what RH said, about him not wanting me to see the computer.

#1 simply said, "Porn."

Aha. Wifey's been gone for days. Who knows, anything could happen. I'm not judging. I'm just saying, as the Network Administrator, I need to see what's up. NastyHighSchoolCheerleaders.com or no.

I did some more looking at things that could be causing our restrictions. Could be causing us to download almost 200MB per hour--that is a LOT of MB. I'm not sure what our download threshold is, but I sure as hell know 200MB exceeds it.

In the top position on the list? Full-length movie download. The third item on the list? Continuous downloading or viewing streaming media content such as audio or video programming. In other words, NetFlix and YouTube are in the top three.

I started a virus scan on our computer, just to be safe. I went up and got C.G.'s computer to make sure her virus protection is up-to-date. Then I walked right out to RH and I said: "I need to get a virus scan started on your computer." He walked right in with me and got the computer out. He said, "I've been watching YouTube instead of watching TV." Huh, think that could affect our system??

Now, all I have to do is figure out how to change the darn password to get online, just in case. You never know when you're going to have to block someone from accessing the Internet. Climbers? Tourists? Who knows. In almost two years, many people know our password by now. It could have gotten around. I also am looking for a way to see if there are other computers accessing our system, besides the ones on the ranch. Tourists beware if I find a way and I find you stealing our internet.

Checking our usage statistics, we have been restricted eight of the last eleven days. That is inconceivable to me. And maddening.

I just hope our service doesn't get terminated, which is an honest-to-god possible consequence of excessive downloading and frequently exceeding the download threshold.

Because if that happened, The Shit Would Hit The Fan.

This is My Lifeline To Civilization we're talking about.

You don't mess with it. Or I Will Mess With You.

A Big New Coffee Mug.

Thank you, thank you, Jenny.

;-)

Fall Feedin'

We're getting ready to sort off the calves and ship them out, which means the majority of the cattle are right around the ranch, and they need to be fed. Together they eat about 12 tons of hay per day. Right now, we are feeding them morning, noon and night.

All those cows kick up a bunch of dust.H-Bomb and Sawed-Off LOVE feeding the cows, and the horses. They simply MUST be out there, on the trailer or in the tractor. If #1 goes out there without them, there is a huge scene. It's not pretty. We got home from school yesterday, and saw Daddy was out feeding. I had to run the boys out there on the four-wheeler so they could "help," even though the feeding was done and all they did was ride back in the tractor with Daddy.

Once we're finished with the cows, who get one-ton bales of hay, it's time to feed the horses. Honestly, if we load the small bales on the trailer and cut the strings, the boys can pretty much feed the horses themselves.

My sweet little cowboys...

The Call of The...Wait. What?

Hubcap? Seriously?

Apparently so. I’ll just come right out and admit it. I am drawn, somewhat secretly and inexplicably, to the hubcaps I see, lost and deserted and shiny along the road to our ranch.

For some reason, they are plentiful here. There is a lot of traffic, after all, headed down to GBNP, and maybe the road is just bumpy enough and just curvy enough to loosen the holds that last little bit so they just fly right off. And land right where I can see them.

I don’t know why they catch my eye so. They appear so…sculptural. So…intricate. So…shiny. I realize this will sound completely, um, redneck of me, but I have visions. Visions of a collection of artistically arranged hubcaps, filling one side of a building perhaps. Lining the rails of a fence. The possibilities are limitless.

But something keeps holding me back. It could possibly be #1, saying, “No. I’m not stopping. That is trashy.” Or perhaps it is the thoughts swirling around in the back of my mind, “That IS kinda trashy. I guess...”

Until Today.

Today, I picked up a hubcap. I had seen it, lying on the side of the road on my way to town this morning. If that is still there when I get back, I thought to myself, I am going to pick it up. I am. I will. If there is no traffic coming.

As luck would have it, it was still there. And there was no traffic. I pulled off to the side, hurried across the road, ironically in my red high heels. Honestly. I picked it up, put it in the van. “What’s that?” H-Bomb asked curiously from the backseat.

“It’s a hubcap, honey,” I replied.

“What’s it for?”

“I’m not sure yet.”

As I said those words, I considered what I had just done, what #1 would say when he discovered it in the garage. I had just picked up a hubcap. A slightly broken, not very intricate, hardly shiny at all hubcap. In fact, the more I looked at it, the more I was convinced that it wasn’t even metal—it looked plastic. I drove on, the hubcap beside me. Not shiny. Not very artistic. Certainly not sculptural. Kind of, shall we say, trashy.

After this short internal debate, and after a truck passed by, I rolled down my window and tossed the hubcap back out. I drove on, not watching to see where it would land. Let someone else pick it up and treasure it for its simplistic, lackluster brokenness. I’ll wait for another one. A better one. A hubcap that is blindingly shiny and unbelievably intricate, possibly from a Porshe or a Benz. Or perhaps I’ll find a hobby that is less, well, trashy.

Addition Progress!

I realized time has gotten away from me when it comes to posting pictures of our addition. Tons of progress has been made, and we find ourselves wishing that it would be completed all at once, rather than in Phase I this year and Phase II at some hopeful future date.

Since my last remodel post, the foundation has been poured:
The floor supports (so I don't know all the technical terms. so what??) were put in:

And the baseboards (another technical term, I'm sure):

And here is where it started to get exciting. The framing of the walls, with windows and doors. For those of you who aren't aware, #1 came up with the idea of extending our house out the back. I took the measurements we came up with, and designed the addition, opening it up to our existing house. So, this is My Very First House Design, and it is exciting and gratifying to see it coming to life.

This end will be the master suite (including bathroom and closets):


And this end, the dining room. In the middle, the new kitchen.



The trusses are going up now. Our roof line will change to accommodate the addition, as you can see.One glitch: the windows we chose have not yet been approved as far as the budget. With all the hemming and hawing, the bid didn't include the right window sizes. I'm not sure how much of a difference there was between the bid and the windows we want, but we are praying that ABEG will give us what we want. I'm not up for much more negotiation on this. I feel like we've already compromised enough.